Open the Valves.

I think I watch myself sometimes,

Crying and over exerting the rhythms of what it means

To be a human living in unprecedented times.

I think about all the suffering and pain,

That makes its way through the global rivers -

Veins and ley lines of the Earth.

And I speak to it,

Because I must.

Because I spent years turning off my heart -

In an effort to stay tough

And impenetrable.

A little tough exterior that helped me move through life

Unphased, unfeeling and numb.

It worked for a while but I could feel myself

Feeling off,

Something was wrong.

I was numb.

I remember opening my heart for the first time -

Waves of grief and pain,

My own and the world's,

Threatening to drown me.

To take me under the depths of my own sensitivity

And leave me naked and clean -

A baby in a cosmic cradle.

I wept.

Because I must,

Feel the oceans of grief that not only afflict me -

But entire nations of people who face this earth

And her stories

And Her challenges

And Her pain.

I cried for the Earth

And let the ocean take me.

I grew strong in my heart.

Exercising this sacred muscle.

She knew where to go.

So I let her.

I let go of the old stories I told myself,

That kept me small and in victim-hood.

Heart open. God led me down barren roads with twists and turns.

Open fields full of daisies and desire

And jungles full of learnings and Gaia.

God decorated my path with teachers.

Young and old.

Inside and out.

Expected and unexpected.

I bowed my head in humility.

For without these moments, these teachings, these timelines -

I would never have learnt to polish the jewels of my pain

And let them shine

Through my frequency.

A ness medicine.

Unique and ready to deliver -

The much needed salve

Of this healing.

Of this experience.